Home Love WHEN LOVE STRIKES DURING TEENAGE
THE SECRET DIARY OF SAMAIRA DAY 9
Hello friends I am Samaira again. After a long time, isn’t it? You must have been wondering where I have gone. Actually I was busy with some serious ghar ka issue (domestic issue). Now I am totally free and ready to share my unusually interesting experiences with you as have already been shared here in different parts under the heading ‘The Secret Diary Of Samaira’. Friends, sometimes, being teens, it really feels awkward and absurd when we feel attracted towards or fall in love with the opposite sex especially when we are in school or at some social functions like parties and weddings where our presence with our parents deem essential. I too have gone through such emotional roller coaster many times in my life. I too have felt being intensely overpowered by such romantic love like feeling as if I urgently wanted to get connected with someone, as if I know that someone by heart, and as if I need that someone to feel myself complete and happy. Such irresistible feelings do come to all of us but it is the misplaced fear and the so-called ethics of our society that prevents us from getting frank, bold, and open. Sometimes it appears to us that we are being unnecessarily controlled and reprimanded by our parents and seniors. Isn’t it? But conversely, I also feel that to some extent they are also right. We always wonder when the time would come when we will be able to do whatever we want to do.
Have you even bitten by the mischievous and naughty bug of ‘lovey dovey feeling’ when we lose control over ourselves, when feelings get unplugged automatically, and things seem flying in front of us? Why does love strike all of us during teenage (with some rare exceptions)? I don’t know what that feeling is – love, physical attraction or some unknown need – and how it overpowers our psychology enormously and hijacks our thinking mind. I don’t know why such feeling gets intensified as soon as we all cross the threshold of our thirteenth year. But one thing is sure that such a feeling makes all of us mad and go almost bamboozled for a while – some even remain crazy for their entire lifetime. Why is it that a stranger who we don’t know at all starts feeling close and familiar to us? Why is it that someone whom we have never met and talked throughout our lives start appearing somebody special and significant to us? Why is it that someone whom we have met only once and don’t know anything about their whereabouts start appearing more special and important – even than our own parents?
The questions are really serious and profound but who can hide the reality, who can remain silent over such burning issue of society, and who can pretend that they don’t know anything about it. What I observed first hand i.e from my own life, reading from books, and through the valuable and effective teaching that I gained from my teacher parents is that such kind of temporary and fleeting attraction that we usually feels during our teenage arises from the effects of our body’s transition phase. Yes friends, the fact is that when our bodies biologically and emotionally switch over from teenage to adolescent to adulthood stage we go through roller coaster of varied hormonal changes. Hormones affect our bodies and emotions tremendously. It is the hormones themselves that prepare our bodies for the adulthood. And that is the reason that our rational mind gets suppressed by periodical hormonal hammering. Hormones affect our physicality and thinking in a significant manner. Sometimes a full matured adult seems like a raging bull when he gets strongly impacted by agitating hormones inside his body.
And you yourself know well what would happen when hormonal changes are taking place inside us – either we get carried away by them or keep ourselves in control and discipline without getting knocked down by their dominance. The killing desire to become physically and emotionally attached to someone usually crops up due to ‘mental unpreparedness’ or ‘mental confusion’ that builds up during the transition phase of our biology. Since most of the teens don’t get proper sex and health education, they ends up committing great blunders of their lives which they then repent in their later years. My little experience in life has told me that an ‘unprepared teenage’ (where parents fail to inculcate right values and right education in their teens) sows the seeds for ‘defective adulthood’ (life full of conflicts, mistakes, worries, tension, and anxiety) in later years where as ‘prepared teenage’ (where parents guided their teens in an appropriate manner) sows the seeds for ‘productive and contented adulthood’ (life full of prosperity, progress, and contentment) for the remainder of life.
We all should understand that it is the ‘mental/teenage confusion’ taking the forms of physical and emotional needs (as engendered by the hormones during teenage) that make us get attracted or fall in love with the opposite sex and it is our ‘mental awareness’ taking the forms of physical, psychological, and social needs that make us fall in love with opposite sex during adulthood.